Monday, May 20, 2013

Angelversary? Birthday? Anniversary?

by Kambra Malone, President/CEO of back in His Arms Again & Mommy of Gabriel Francis Malone

I’m a very private person. Not with my story of how Gabriel died but with MY feelings on his death. I keep what Shawn and I shared in these few days quiet and sacred. I have written a book. It has it all. But haven’t felt like sharing it yet. Maybe posting this blog might be my first step in being able to share a little more?

Today is May 20, 2013. It’s been eight years since Gabriel's death. I have had 7 other of these May 20th days pass already. Some of the May 20th days have been like every other day and I have felt badly that I just went about my day, always thinking of our son but not crying or overwhelmed. I found PEACE. This May 20 is a little different. Lots of memories of this day and all we went through to get our son for burial are flooding my mind.I truly think I am feeling so much pain as Gabriel was the start of something that is now my full time mission. To honor all life with the charitable organization of “Back In His Arms Again”. Even though I feel very tearful I feel very close to this little guy as he has been fast at work in heaven! And he has friends in “high” places and lots and lots of other Holy Innocents fighting the “good fight”.

For me this day is Gabriel’s BIRTHDAY. This makes many people very uncomfortable. If they had seen his tiny perfection I am quite certain that my skeptics would agree. Gabriel was perfect. The tiniest piece of GOD's miraculous work. He was made in GOD's image.

Our children are the “treasures of our hearts”. Gabriel may have been the tiniest…..but he has made the most profound impact on how we now live our lives for ETERNITY. At each Mass during the consecration we know that we are united with all I heaven. Jesus has given all of us an amazing opportunity to be with our children gone to soon. I LOVE the Mass. I LOVE the Eucharist. I am thankful for my husband who so tenderly placed our son in his casket when no one else would. I am thankful for our children who made his funeral and memory a blessed one! Most of all I am thankful that Jesus chose Shawn and I to have this baby boy who through his intersession is doing mighty things.

Happy BIRTHDAY Gabriel, your Mommy loves you!


  1. I also am a fan of saying birthday. In fact at Alex's Birthday last October we took birthday balloons to his grave! It was the day he was born even if he wasn't born alive.

  2. Thank you for sharing this, Kambra. No life, however brief, is without purpose and meaning. This kind of loss teaches us to think and live differently than before. Blessings to you and yours. And thank you, Gabriel.